'Life Unexpected' brings nothing new to the table

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By Emley Kerry

Imitation may be the finest form of flattery, but imitation as self-definition makes for one unoriginal TV show. Such is the case with "Life Unexpected," CW's new tween-aged family drama that is touting itself - per misguided TV Guide Magazine review - as "Juno" meets "Gilmore Girls," a desperate yet lazy attempt to rope in the audiences of its predecessors.

In the Venn diagram of its supposed influences, the only overlapping theme related to "Life Unexpected" is a young girl and her familial relationship. If that sounds sufficiently vague, it's because "Life Unexpected" lacks the dry wit and bulls-eye deadpan acting of "Juno" but overflows with the inanity, schmaltz, and vapid dialogue of "Gilmore Girls."

Although the 45-minute drama (err, comedy) deals with issues that are, in theory, quite substantial, it tackles them with the bumbling disregard of the former CW show but with none of the coming-of-age dexterity of "Juno." In short, "Life Unexpected" is simple and cognitively uncomplicated, with a straightforward and obvious approach to human emotions.

The program revolves around a flimsy plot: 15-year-old foster-brat Lux tracks down her birthparents to get their signatures on routine paperwork so she can be emancipated from the foster system that has failed her, only to be released into the custody of her biological parents due to a glitch in the legal system.

Her father, Nathanial Basil (played by a blank-faced Kristoffer Polaha), is a perpetually blitzed, aging man-boy who lives above a bar. He is, predictably, unfazed by the news that he has a daughter. Her mother Cate Cassidy (cherubic faced Shiri Appleby), talk-jock of a morning radio show, is upset that the daughter she thought she gave up for adoption when she got pregnant at age 15 ended up getting shuffled around the foster care system. When the state of Oregon decides, rather implausibly, to release Lux into the custody of her biological parents who hadn't yet decided to take her in, they agree to do so as if they were adopting a dog from the pound.

The scenes are punctuated by tired clichés, such as when Lux is blowing out the candles of her birthday cake, and, when prompted to make a wish, she looks around and says "It already has." With one last puff, she extinguishes the remaining candle, and any hopes that this show has of staying on the air for longer than a season.

Final verdict: If you find references to Zima and the Spin Doctors antiquated or unrecognizable and are too young for the Tiger Weekly you're reading to be relevant, then you might fall into the intended viewer age bracket. And if maudlin guitar strumming and raspy singing over dramatic scenes is your idea of a good TV soundtrack, then tune in to the CW Monday nights at 8 p.m. Otherwise, steer clear of this smarmy doozie.

Originally Published: Issue 863 - February 3, 2010

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