Confessions of an extreme feminist bartender

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By Alexandra Giamalva

“It’s not that I don’t love my job. I actually do like the bar. I just don’t like the non-tipping, sexually harassing assholes that frequent it,” begins Lauren, a Baton Rouge bartender whose name has been changed.

Reminiscent of the PO’d professor I interviewed a few weeks prior, I braced myself for the release of built-up abuse that I certainly knew was ahead.

“My biggest complaint of being a bartender is the lack of respect for women,” she said. “Don’t call me ‘sweetie’ when you are trying to get my attention. Don’t ask me if I have a boyfriend or for my number. I’m at my workplace. Do I come to your work and hit on you? As a working woman, don’t appreciate the lack of respect.”

Oh no. It looked like I had an extreme feminist on my hands. I doubted the “lack of respect” had much to do with her gender and had more to do with the intoxication effect of the drinks she was serving. I’ll say now that I’m terrified of girls like this. So, for fear that she would burn me with her lit cigarette or start quoting Janis Joplin, I just let her continue.

“When I first started out in this industry, I was furious to find out that many bars in this city only hire male bartenders. It’s just sexist,” Lauren said.

Now, this surprised me. Alcohol, bars and pickup lines are synonymous with each other, in my opinion. Annoying? Of course. Disrespectful? Duh. But, still inevitable, which is why some women chose to avoid many bars. But, hiring only male bartenders seemed to be violating something – a law, an amendment, something.

“The reasons the owners gave for not hiring me ranged from a lack of experience to my inflexible schedule. But, I know the real reason. It’s because I’m a woman,” Lauren said confidently.

Maybe Lauren was right. Or, maybe she had a lack of experience and an inflexible schedule. But, what she said next seemed to be a problem that every bartender would probably complain about.

“Proper bar-room etiquette is to tip $1 per drink. Not per order. If some dick walks up to the bar and orders 10 drinks for his posse and only tips $1, that’s just not cool,” said Lauren.

Although I agreed, I wondered why Lauren didn’t just quit. She seemed to hate every possible aspect of her job.

“Even though some people don’t tip very well, the money is still really great. I can make $200 in just one night. I couldn’t find another job that pays that much if I tried!”

You could become a stripper.

I almost said it. But I knew she wouldn’t laugh. And like I said, I’m afraid of those extreme feminist types.

If there’s one thing that Lauren was able to teach Tiger Weekly’s readers, it’s that a polite brush off to a guy who is hitting on you simply isn’t enough. Turns out, I can just become a bartender, giving me an excuse to call them all sexist woman haters … and get away with it.

Originally Published: Issue 607 - May 6, 2008

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